Simucon 2002 Quotes

Sorry, the list isn't as long as last year's. I was only at one night of D&D, and my laptop was being extremely finicky due to a dying hard drive and dead batteries.

Here goes!::flees all the GMs who didn't want to be quoted::


So much stuff it's 45 minutes long.--Solomon on the Year In Review(DragonRealms)

It is about time that someone decided that Moon Mages Had sects. And not familiar sects.--Valdrik

There will be lots of killing of Halfling Children and gnomes of all shapes and sizes. Short races are bad. Dwarves included.-Valdrik

[Sentient magic weapons]-that means your sword is smarter than you are. No we're not giving the lore requirements to the sword.--Valdrik

If you like what I've done so far, you haven't seen anything yet, and if you don't like what I've done so far, then I don't like you.-Rottcloar

Warrior mages' heads will explode when they try to smoke images.-Fial

You want to do what, are you mad as a badger?--Valdrik quoting Maelona

Valdrik said that War Mages should have sects.--Acoya
They should, but they wouldn't know what to do with it if they had it.-Tribanin

When neutral isn't good enough-the militant druid. They don't drive spikes into the trees to stop the lumberjacks, they animate the trees to drive spikes into the lumberjacks.--Tribanin

If a twig snaps in the forest, how many lumberjacks does the druid kill?--Tribanin

I don't know why I put this in my mouth.-Tribanin

All lore is going away.-Tribanin
Magic will be replaced by lore?
Traders will be getting magic
Moon mages are getting weapon ranks
Barbarians will be getting caravans
Thieves are getting enchanting
Thieves can no longer kill things
Empaths are getting backstab
War Mages will require thief skills

The first lore skill will be chairmaking.-Tribanin after Damissak stole his chair

My original plan for this part of the seminar was to give everyone a little piece of playdough and tell you guys to break it. But then I stopped and realized how quickly it travels and didn't want to get hit by any.-Tribanin

Wait til they start skinning the players.-Tribanin on how critters will act more like players

Some of the larger substances will be brawling instruments, like torches.--Fial
Like what? -- Magdar
Torches.-Fial
Oh, I thought you said horses!--Magdar

Type louder! Talk in all caps.-Solomon

No, I'm not taking anything off.-Solomon

Because Celtic isn't here...and the crowd goes wild.--Solomon

It's a little horny helmet with spikes.--Solomon

Melissa had a few things to say. Would you like to come speak into my mike?--Solomon

What's your alignment again?--Tribanin to Itron
Chaotic Stupid--Mozzik

I'm casting Haste on my ass.-Mozzik

You said you were going to entertain yourself while watching everyone else? Oh, BY watching everyone else.-Tribanin

So what are you doing, Forest-killer?
Run, Forrest, Run!--Tribanin

Everyone that's entertaining themselves...[pause]...raise BOTH hands...-Tribanin

A crab lands in front of your feet. Now *that's* entertainment.-Tribanin

I should rewrite the name of this to kill the Dragon-in-Training Sorcerer. Kill the fucking forest-killing Dragon-in-training sorcerer.-Tribanin

The druid was blow-drying her squirrel.-Tribanin

Your ass is wiggling quickly. And the barbarian ontop of you is panicking.-Tribanin

Ooooh, I didn't check for your squirrel.-Tribanin

I'm casting Cat's Reflex on myself.--Cadaya
You're casting castration?!--Tribanin

Death is only a state of mind.-Magdar

Never run a D&D game with a team with 1 dragon-in-training and 4 dragonslayers-in-training.--Everyone from D&D


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