Simucon 2010 Quotes

Even more quotes than last year.

Which is kind of sad, considering I didn't have a laptop with me and hand wrote everything.

If you are not at least 18 years of age, stop reading and go somewhere else.

Really, I mean it.

Don't blame me if your parents get mad.

Rampantly out of order. No D&D this year, either. Sorry!

To quote a t-shirt I saw at a con a few years ago: You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can be misquoted and used against you.

Any quote which doesn't have who it's by after it is unknown. If you know who said it, please let me know!

ALSO: Please note, I am not trying to be coy as to which GM was what PC. I wrote down names as to who I remember as being what GM or character the best (i.e. I think of Mario/GM Wyrom/Dhask as Dhask before either of the other two names, so that's how I wrote it down unless someone actually SAID another name.). I typed the quotes up directly from my notes, so I didn't update anything.

Vyrshkana/Cheesecake Gnome

It's very simple. I say penis, and she writes it down. - Jolebin

So how do you like the serious airbag? It's S-R-S airbag. - Vyrshkana
For serious crashes? - Raili

Does that say what I think it says? - Orainissa
What, Earth City? - Nilandia
No, that license plate. - Orainissa
I don't know, what does it say? - Gretchen
LOL BMW, and it's on a BMW. - Orainissa

They're all ahead of us now, but you know what? I know where I'm going. I think. - Orainissa

Male figure skaters have awesome asses. - Jolebin

If there's a split charge and I want the peanut butter and jelly for two, can I get it for one or is there a charge? - Orainissa
Why don't you ask the server and let's see her reaction. - Nilandia

I am going to make love to Bambina in the most heterosexual way possible. - Jolebin

I hit things with my car. - Orainissa
Do you kill them? - Vyrshkana
Not living things. - Orainissa
Remind me not to make you mad. - Nilandia

You know, you could just follow Jolebin around. - Nilandia

I'm not picky. I take that back, I can be very picky, but right now I'm not picky at all. - Orainissa

You've never played Munchkin? - Nilandia
Nope. - Orainissa
Ooo, a virgin. - Vyrshkana

Do you get to hit anyone? - Orainissa
Not in real life. - Vyrshkana
That's why I was asking! - Orainissa

Can I hit them with my car? - Orainissa
Apparently so! - Vyrshkana

Okay, I'm caught up now. Feel free to say more quotes. - Vyrshkana
Penis. - Jolebin
Well, he said it. - Nilandia
Okay, vagina. - Bambina

You coming out of the bathroom wearing that shirt is just wrong. - Nilandia about Jolebin's "You have died of dysentery" t-shirt

Should I say penis again louder when she comes back? - Jolebin

Write penis down and don't cover your face. - Pridenjoy (trying to take Vyrshkana's picture)

Look this way and say penis. - Pridenjoy

He knows there are normal people in there, right? - Orainissa
Oh, there are normal people in there. - Pridenjoy (wandering back in two seconds later)

You took advantage of an old lady to relieve your boredom?! - Nilandia
Just a normal Sunday afternoon for Tyrathia. - Jolebin

I saved the alcohol. - Arlia
At least you have your priorities straight. - Nilandia
I grew up Catholic and my dad always said that wasting alcohol is a horrible sin. - Arlia

Jolebin is singing showtunes. We have reached a new level of gayness. - Nilandia
Actually it's an old level for me. - Jolebin

My music would be Jazz Hands the Musical. - Jolebin

Tip it, tip it! - Jolebin
There aren't any cows! - Vyrshkana

What'd he do, yell too hard and break something? - Arlia quoting Sereh about Willy Mays' death last year

My god it's quiet. Something horrible's going to happen. - Orainissa

How would you like that cooked? - server
Medium rare. - Vyrshkana
You went a little fast. - Nilandia
Of all people you should know they have to catch up. - Orainissa

Would anybody kill me if I actually licked the plate? - Vyrshkana
Yes, I have knives, I think I'll get them. - Nilandia

You didn't think I'd do it, did you? - Vyrshkana
No, actually, I'm not surprised. - Nilandia
Here, kitty kitty kitty. - Orainissa
Of all the people I know here, Jenn has no shame. - Nilandia
You haven't met me then, have you. - Orainissa
You have no shame. - Nilandia
You're talking about people with no shame and you aren't talking about me? - Jolebin
Apparently a lot of people have no shame. - Nilandia

The painkillers said don't drink alcohol, but the atropan didn't so I am. - Jolebin

Oh, the wonders of the human body. - Jolebin
And Jolebin is quite the active student. - Nilandia

Can I get you anything? - server
A larger stomach? - Vyrshkana

Somebody found the power button for Jolebin. - Vyrshkana

I'm still awake. - Orainissa
Wow. - Vyrshkana
I know. - Orainissa
You're better than him. - Vyrshkana, pointing to Jolebin

I think everyone's going back to the hotel and taking a nap. - Vyrshkana
A nap? Are you kidding me? You think I'm going to wake up again? - Orainissa
Of course, JOlebin doesn't have to go back to the hotel. - Vyrshkana

Oh, look, food! - Nilandia
You mean they serve food here? - Orainissa

Do not feed the Trolebin. - Jolebin

What are you doing? - Nilandia
She's making powdered crackers.- Orainissa
No, I'm making rice. - Mandy
Out of wheat? - Nilandia
She's an alchemist! - Orainissa
She needs a cauldron! - Nilandia
No, she needs a morter! - Orainissa
And then she needs silver fang! - Nilandia

Anybody order wings? - server
Over here. He could use a pillow. - Orainissa

It's ten o'clock. - Naos
Do you know where your children are? - Jolebin

I got a side of mashed potatoes with a dish that comes with mashed potatoes. I really gotta read the menu more closely. - Naos

And only in the Midwest could you order mashed potatoes with a meal that comes with mashed potatoes and not be questioned about it. - Bambina

Ah! - Vyrshkana
That's hot! - Orainissa
You should have told her before she picked it up! - Nilandia
Well, if she'd told me she was going to… - Orainisaa

Okay, who said what?! - Vyrshkana

I think we've gotten to the point where we're so tired we're giddy. - Nilandia
Gotten? - Orainissa
I think we've been there for a while. - Vyrshkana
Well, apparently I have more stamina than you. - Nilandia
I don't even know why I'm laughing. I think I'm at the point where I don't want to know why I'm laughing. - Vyrshkana

I brought a blender so I can make frappes. - Jolebin
You're my new best friend. - Orainissa

No, the other left, the other left! - Vyrshkana
Right! Exactly! - Orainissa

You failed your ranged roll. - Orainissa to Arlia after she accidentally 'dropped' a fork in the direction of a passing server
I was going to say you need more training in thrown weapons. - Vyrshkana

I'm going to need to buy another notepad at this point. - Vyrshkana
Stay with us and you'll need about a dozen. - Orainissa

You can get a lot of things in Montana. Just not that. - Orainissa
Oh my god, the lines I could say to that. - Vyrshkana
Can you get all the usual kinds of hookers? - Jolebin

It sounds to me like the normals are having more fun than us. - Vyrshkana
That should be impossible.- Gretchen
I could hit them with my car. - Orainissa

I was telling a story, wasn't I?- Orainissa

Me, you, Gretchen, and Jolebin. - Vyrshkana on people generating quotes so far this year
What? - Jolebin

Even if Mario minds, he's outvoted. - Arlia
We can put him in the closet instead. - Orainissa

I'm not sober enough. - Nilandia
I'm completely sober. There's something wrong here. - Orainissa

Why are we all S-P-E-L-L-I-N-G? - Jolebin
Because I C-A-N-'-T spell. - Orainissa
I C-N-O-W. - Naos
I fail at life. - Naos

Get me when I'm more cohesive. - Orainissa
We're going to be waiting a long time. - Nilandia

At this point I just hope I can read my writing. - Vyrshkana
If you can't, just give it to me to decipher.- Orainissa
Penis, penis, penis, what else? - Pridenjoy
Vagina. - Bambina

You guys are having entirely too much fun in here. - server
Entirely at my expense, too. - Vyrshkana

There's no pictures in this book! Where's the pictures?! - Pridenjoy

I was going to say-Vyrshkana
--something really really bad. - Vyrshkana and Nilandia

I'm all adult man baby. - Jolebin

I'm a glutton for punishment. - Arlia
We know. - Nilandia

You can only write the word penis so many times. - Jolebin
That depends on how many different ways you can use it. - Orainissa

Maybe you can use it like the Smurfs. - Bambina

I used to be able to breathe my air, and not drink my air. - Orainissa

You can't see it from there. Go towards the kitchen and turn left before you get there. - Vyrshkana
The other left! - Orainissa

Okay, which way's left again? - Orainissa

If this stuff moves, hit it with something. - Orainissa

Your stuff didn't move. We were talking about hitting it with your car, but then we'd have to move it. - Vyrshkana

Well, at least you won't have any trouble pulling out. - Vyrshkana

More torture by cellphone. - Vyrshkana

You are just bizarre. I love you so much. - Nilandia
I might be more normal tomorrow, I make no promises. - Orainissa

Now the wisdom of getting in the care with me, that's your problem. - Orainissa
And I probably should have ran screaming. - Nilandia
Probably. - Orainissa
The real problem isn't that you got into the car with me, it's that you sat down and ate a meal with me and then got in the car with me again. - Orainissa
And now I'm going to sleep with you. - Nilandia

He wants to come back naked. - Orainissa
What? - Raili

Motel, hotel… - Nilandia
Chalet. - Vyrshkana
Whatever. - Nilandia
Building. It's a building. - Orainissa
Just don't hit it. - Nilandia
I think it's pretty structurally sound. - Orainissa
Just don't hit it too hard. I don't want to see the SRS airbag in action. - Nilandia

I didn't kill anybody. Yet. - Orainissa
Thank you for that. - Raili
Hey, I'm here 'til Sunday. I have plenty of chances. - Orainissa

Haven't I seen this hallway before? - Orainissa

Am I anything like my character? - Orainissa
Am I anything like Vyrsh? - Vyrshkana
Do you really want an honest answer? - Orainissa

You are going to need a few more notepads. Especially if I get drunk. - Orainissa

Do I want to take my Munchkin or not? - Nilandia
I thought she was coming with us. - Orainissa
Was she calling me a Munchkin?! - Vyrshkana

I don't drink, which is why I'm dangerous. - Vyrshkana

This is part of our bar. - Essentius
Part of? - Nilandia
This is only $180 worth. - Essentius

People just threw money at me. - Nilandia
It's called stripping. - Orainissa
And it's all $20s. - Essentius
And it was at the grocery store! - Jubalee

I was hoping he would start purring. - Vyrshkana while scratching Essentius' scalp
I think he just did. - Nilandia

Aw, Lindsay Lohan's in jail for 90 days. - Rob
Like I care. - Vyrshkana
You can quote that if you want. - Essentius

Do I need to hit him? - Vyrshkana about Essentius
He'd probably enjoy it too much. - Jubalee

I think my favorite quote you got from me from about 2007 is that straight men are useless. - Essentius
That's hurtful and probably moderately true. - Garett

Why don't you just eat your way out? - Orainissa
I don't contort that way. - Garett

Oh, son of a bitch. - Garett
Yes? - Essentius

Oh, wait, I know why I'm still awake. - Vyrshkana
Cause you haven't gone to sleep yet? - Jubalee

It's after midnight. - Garett
Uh-oh. - Jubalee
Essentius cackles madly.
What's that mean? - Orainissa
It means he can be bad. - Vyrshkana

Did you ever see the movie Gremlins? Someone get the water. - Jubalee
No, now we have to feed him, I'm sure someone's already gotten him wet. - Orainissa
Pause while first Vyrshkana, then everyone else starts laughing hysterically.
You're my new best friend. - Essentius to Orainissa
And he's still being good.- Jubalee
Someone get me the brain bleach please! - Vyrshkana
And that's why! - Essentius
No, it's just that my brain already knows where to go without your having to say anything. - Vyrshkana

Wait, twice a year you get dressed? - Nilandia
Yeah. - Valaraukar

They discovered you weren't wearing pants? - Orainissa
No, there was a security issue. - Valaraukar

I just tell people I've got a great memory. It's just too short. - Lewthor

No, see, Valmos-Adam is Vadam, Caden-Adam is Cadam, Belnia-Adam is Belnadam, and Eldreth-Adam is Eldradam. - Nilandia

Actually, if I haven't looked at you inappropriately by Saturday you should probably take it as an insult. - Essentius

Friday or Saturday is when 'con hits Caligular levels. - Valaraukar

It's scary, my brain's still working. - Eldreth

I got my liquor out, but not my suitcases. - Valmos

I was just hanging out with my girlfriend. - Essentius
He's gone straight. - Flura

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow. - Vyrshkana
Are you all right? - Arlia
That's hot! - Vyrshkana
Oh. - Arlia
Just treating my bug bites. Pay no attention to the screaming gnome in the bathroom. - Vyrshkana

I will wake up and tomorrow I will be perfectly normal. One can dream. - Orainissa

You should just start using symbols for everyone. - Dhask
I am not going to turn everyone into the artist formerly known as Prince. - Vyrshkana

I will remember it. It will come to me. Three weeks from now. - Orainissa
Well, if you remember it in the middle of the night, you can wake me up. - Dhask

You seem friendly enough. Do you kick puppies in your spare time? - Orainissa
Yeah. - Dhask
Well, you shouldn't do that. - Orainissa

I guess I should plug my cell phone in. But that sounds like a lot of effort. - Orainissa

Do they have any twenty-four hour things? - Dhask
I don't think so. - Vyrshkana
But then I'd have to put on real pants. - Orainissa

You can do whatever you want, unless it's illegal. Then we might try to stop you, because I don't want to be an accessory. - Orainissa

If it could carry that much weight I think I'd keep it, send it out on the freak show circuit or something. - Nilandia
If it were in game, I'd, like, animate it and use is as an extra disk. - Vyrshkana
Now that is a use I could get behind. - Orainissa about a spider offering a chest of gold as tribute for its life

Why do I have the strange urge to break out into song? - Orainissa
With or without jazz hands? - Vyrshkana
Without. I'm not much of a jazz hands person. - Orainissa
Don't tell that to Jolebin. - Nilandia
Jolebin has enough jazz hands for both of us. - Orainissa

What's going on in here? - Dhask
Gretchen's in the chatroom saying mean things about [Vyrshkana] and then Vyrsh smacked her and then [Gretchen] typed OW. - Orainissa

I've never had to go back and check over what I've just said for posterity before. - Orainissa
Yeah, that's why I'm just being quiet over here. - Dhask

And she does it with jazz hands.- Vyrshkana about Nilandia's claim to having more soul than Rvain in chat

I'm kind of thinking about going down with Dhask. I'm glad I didn't use another preposition. - Vyrshkana

You know, at some point, she's going to kill you. - Vyrshkana
I know, but it's worth it. - Nilandia, about torturing Orainissa by cell phone

That, and who the GPS manages to drive insane. - Vyrshkana about Nilandia's post about Simucon updates (listing who got smashed drunk)

Good morning! - Essentius
Morning? - Nilandia
It's morning somewhere. - Vyrshkana
It might be a few time zones away… - Essentius

If things are exploding it's probably George. - Essentius
If things are incomprehensible, it's probable Wanderstar. - Jubalee

We've been committing mild acts of torture by cell phone. - Vyrshkana

Hit on female in… - Essentius in GPS mode

You wake up. You see a note from Destrution. - Dordie
And 20 dinar on the nightstand. - Essentius

I like the war staff. - Essentius
Yeah, but no one was able to explain it to me! - Shavay
That's because Wanderstar made it - Essentius

It's two in the afternoon and Flura… - Essentius
…is blitzed off her ass. - Shavay

I'd be gay for him. - Flura about Essentius

Are you just going to drop me out there by myself? - Flura being carried outside by Essentius

Chivalry is not dead, but it's in a coma, and we're thinking about pulling the plug. - Shavay

What are they going to do with the kid? - Essentius
Boarding school. - Vyrshkana
For a con weekend? - Emeris

Mom and Dad want to go to a con for five days, so we're sending you to boarding school. - Emeris

Cupcakes growing in a field? What fantasy world are you living in? - Essentius

I punch my husband every night. Not in the face. - Flura

This might be the main reason for the divorce, besides the fact that he's an asshole. - Xynwen

It's a kid I broke a few times. - Arlia
You broke your kid? - Vyrshkana

Why are all the DR people at the Gemstone table? - Vyrshkana
It's not the Gemstone table, we're just making the sign. - table

I'm like, don't bother me, jerking. - Jolebin
I want to fill a vault with jerky and then swim around in it like Scrooge McDuck. - Jolebin

If you have a bowl of him every day you can lower your cholesterol. - Dhask on Nebhrail

Why am I back over here with the food I don't want to eat? - Vyrshkana

I had a big bottle of Godiva chocolate liqueur and I would use it to make chocolate milk. - Orainissa
Now that is a good idea. - Nilandia
It is a very good idea. - Orainissa

I do remember waking up the next morning going why the hell does my ass hurt. - Orainissa

I flew up from Texas with a pair of ropers with a six-month-old baby. I deserve a shot. - Mourdeyan
You deserve two or three. - Orainissa
Line those suckers up! - Mourdeyan

We have, like, eight people and five of them are Gonif and one's a GM and the other's a random guy named John. - Toreakas
Jim. - Sipf
A random guy named Jim. - Toreakas

I didn't drink any fish. - Lewthor

When we got done with everything, I remembered I should probably fill this. - Eldreth puts silver skull-and-crossbones flask on table

I had a sockitini and it tasted just like a cosmopolitan. -

I was going to say, because that's pretty much what goes on between now and Saturday. - Dhask
Drinking? - Vyrshkana
Stupid stuff. - Dhask

I just remember when Naos was Trying to make Orainissa perky. - Orainissa

You should know, her character has serious issues with wagons. - Nilandia
That makes it worse. - Dhask

Are you really sure you want me to do that when I'm drunk? - Orainissa
A drunk wikian. - Dhask

This is not the information you're looking for. - Orainissa

We have silenced the chat again. - Nilandia
I have nothing to add at this time. - Orainissa

The nice thing about being out there is that is that you can hear yourself think - Vyrshkana
I don't think. - Raelee

My food is cold. - Nilandia
My food is supposed to cold. If it comes out of the kitchen hot, there's a problem. - Orainissa
There's a fire mage battle going on in the kitchen. - Vyrshkana

If you're not slightly burnt stepping out of the shower… - Dhask

That was an adventure. - Orainissa
What? - Vyrshkana
When we went to Vivian's - Orainissa
Prepare to turn… - Nilandia in GPS mode

It's not like we can't grow you your own… - Orainissa
It's not like we can't log into Farmville. - Dhask, about Vyrshkana and Nilandia fighting over the last onion ring at Drunken Fish

The definition of foreplay in Texas: Get in the truck, bitch. - Mourdeyan

There's a hole in her glass, it's called her mouth. - Vyrshkana to the waitress about Orainissa's Flirtini

I've got to embrace my feminine side and get the Chocolate Heaven. - Eldreth

Eat me, Karen! - Mourdeyan to a bite of lobster tail

Do not make me kill you over a drink! I may be a cleric in the game but if you die out here I can't do anything. - Orainissa

Look at her, she's just sucking on it. Oh my god, she's tonguing it! She's tonguing it! - Mourdeyan watching Vyrshkana "eat" a bite of lobster tail
I AM NOT! - Vyrshkana

This is just the equivalent of food porn to me. It's just that good. - Vyrshkana about the lobster tail

Let's just say I'm REALLY glad it's noisy in here. - Vyrshkana

I'm always happy to get a little tail. - Orainissa

I will probably drink anything you put in front of me. - Orainissa

Take this away from me before I start treating it like I did the lobster. - Vyrshkana about the strawberry

How many of those Flirtinis are you going to drink?! - Vyrshkana to Orainissa
As many as she wants! - Waitress

Is that a phone in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? - Nilandia
I don't know, why don't you reach in and find out? - Orainissa

Don't mind me, I'm just doing weird things. - Orainissa
And this is news? - Nilandia

If I attempt to get behind the wheel of my car, you have my permission to beat me senseless. - Orainissa

Lady, lady! - Mourdeyan trying to get the waitress' attention
Nice lady! - Eldreth in the style of Animaniacs

They're sitting across the table from each other and texting. - Mourdeyan about Eldreth and Arlia

I am not an adult, we have been through this before. - Orainissa

I have some wood for sheep. - Nebhrail
Something about that statement does not surprise me. - Orainissa

I think Orainissa found a way to mess up this time. - Nilandia
I think that was your last Flirtini. - Vyrshkana

What's really rather scary is that he makes a better woman that I do. - Nilandia about Phil

I don't think I've ever had a drink quite as dangerous as that one. - Orainissa
You just had to take revenge on it, didn't you? - Vyrshkana

I might have early after I become a heckler - Nebhrail about going to the Funny Bone

At this point in time I am the joke. - Orainissa

I'm confused. - Orainissa
That doesn't take much right now, does it? - Nilandia
No, it doesn't. - Orainissa

I'm so confused. - Nilandia
I'm the drunk one. Why are you confused?! - Orainissa

I thought they added a gratuity if they have a group of more than seven? - Mourdeyan
We had separate checks. - Nilandia

Maybe they're afraid of us. Very afraid. - Arlia

Oh yay, we get to kill people. - Orainissa
Gretchen and Eldreth get to kill people. You and me get to raise people. - Arlia to Orainissa

Look, it's a bachelor's baseball game. Unless they had a gangbang. - Mourdeyan

Let's go tie Valmos up. He'll like it and sing for us. - Nilandia

I have feelings? - Orainissa

I don't know who, but someone's about to get a random hug. - Orainissa

I want to write those down. - Vyrshkana
Just lay him across the copy machine. - Gwenddolyn

Alas, poor Yorick, I knew him well, Horatio. - Shavay to Eldreth's skull-shaped glass flask of Death Rum

Spoons, the game formerly known as assassins. - Eldreth

You are not having a fishbowl of that. - Vyrshkana to Flura about Death Rum
Why, because then I'll become a lesbian and like men? - Flura

What about class? - Jolebin
You don't have any. - Vyrshkana

Any conflicts between the rules and the cards, go with the card. Otherwise, go with the owner of the set. Unfortunately, Bubba is not here right now. - Nilandia

Do I lose a little piece of my soul if I drink it? - Veriaus

I will take the leather armor. - Jolebin
You look ravishing in it. - Nilandia
I was just saying in the improv I wanted something that accentuated my bust. - Jolebin

That's okay, you didn't really have much class to begin with. - Jolebin

I get my revenge. - Nilandia
Yes, because I'm a lesbian now. - Jolebin

Now I'm still a lady with lady parts. - Jolebin

Your enticement's Phil over there. How's that for you? - Tamuz

Who wants to see me turn Bubba into an instant Ophion? - Eldreth offers Bubba the flask of Death Rum
No. - Bubba

You guys are on vacation. You have to start drinking at eight in the morning. Otherwise you're doing it wrong. - Brikus

If you go down on a centaur, it's bestiality, but if a centaur goes down on you it's considered normal. - Valmos

The bible says love others as you love yourself, but you can't walk around jacking others off. - Valmos

I have three issues with DR. One… - Eldreth
It's DR. - Orainissa

I'm not sure, but I think Russell might be gay. - Brikus about Essentius

That's more than enough. - Vyrshkana
I have a very high tolerance. - Eulogia
That's what you think.- Vyrshkana about Death Rum

Oh my god, I sound like I lost all my IQ points. - Arlia
No, I just sounded drunk and couldn't stand up straight. - Orainissa

Premature elevation! - Gretchen
Okay, I missed something here… - Vyrshkana

Does she have a dead body on her screen? - Nilandia

Why do you have a dead body on your computer screen? - Orainissa
It's not a dead body! - Nilandia
Don't make me kill you over a screensaver! - Vyrshkana
It's not a screensaver! - Nilandia
Er, wallpaper. -Vyrshkana
It looks like a dead body! - Orainissa
It's not a wallpaper either! And he's not dead! - Nilandia
Well, he looks dead! - Orainissa
He's not dead! Nilandia
Okay, he came back to life! There was a cleric off screen! - Orainissa, about a video clip Nilandia was watching and Orainissa could see from across the room

The floor is actually pretty comfortable, once you put enough stuff underneath you… - Dhask
Like a mattress? - Orainissa
Yeah, like four pillows, or five… - Dhask

Please ignore the… - Vyrshkana
Cursing Catholic in the bathroom? - Orainissa
Yeah. - Vyrshkana

The one nice thing about being quoted so much this year is that I will more than likely remember your name next year. - Vyrshkana
Next year, years to come… - Orainissa

I'm getting smacked in the leg by a Transformer. - Nilandia
Which Transformer, Bumblebee? Optimus Prime? -Vyrshkana
If it's smacking me in the leg, it's gotta be a Decepticon. - Nilandia
Nerd! - Nilandia

Oh my god, I was trying to type in cosmopolitan. I wound up typing cosmopolitician. - Vyrshkana

That was an adventure. What? When we went to Vivian's. Prepare to turn… - Vyrshkana reading a quote from the night before, including the last line in GPS mode
SHUT UP! - Orainissa screaming from the bathroom

Note to self: When going to the AoH room, bring A buddy, not four. - Nilandia

Sorry, I was trying to figure out what the hell I wrote.
Words? - Nilandia
On a page. - Orainissa

God damnit, where'd I put my lotion? - Orainissa
On your body? - Nilandia
No, that's after I find it. I wouldn't put it on a dead body. - Orainissa

Like I said, I'll go anywhere. - Orainissa
REALLY? - Nilandia

Ok, I'm going to take a shower, so nobody say anything funny. - Vyrshkana
Penis! - Arlia
Let's use up all our funny quotes for the day. - Orainissa
Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina. - Arlia

I think we should get going. Eulogia's waiting for us,. - Nilandia
He's a man, he's supposed to be used to waiting for us. Of course, he does play a woman. - Orainissa

You're not a lobster, you're just bright red. - Vyrshkana to Mourdeyan

Munchkin? Not tonight, honey, I have a headache. - Mourdeyan

Let's play Where's Waldo. - Nebhrail
Wouldn't it just be Where's Nebhrail? - Vyrshkana

If you guys don't show up I find it really hard to justify taking a week off. - Bubba

There's a lot of big things to talk about. Leather body suits. Corinthian leather body suits.- Bubba

Without you guys, we'd just be sitting around drinking. - Sirina
Aren't you guys doing that anyways? - Vyrshkana

How about a divorce package? How about an I-hate-your-guts package? - Mourdeyan about the expanded wedding packages

…newly on Josh's team still learning to break things. - Tamuz

I am the new meat for Dev. - Tiqal

My goal is to get things out into game as quickly as humanly possible so you guys can start breaking things. - Flannihan

There's a document on how the mentor sprites came to be. - Xynwen

Player mail is almost done for the third time, I think. - Sleken

You can send items COD. - Sleken

No, I don't want to stand at the podium. - Kaikala
Sure you do. - Sirina

You've got mail! - AOL on someone's laptop
I thought the player mail system wasn't out yet! - Vyrshkana
It's in beta testing! - someone in crowd

We have the Ebon Gate festival coming up. Hopefully it will be awesome. - Kaikala
No, it WILL be awesome. - Galene

Eorgina got no love and the justification for that is that she's a stuck up bitch. - Korelys

Stand and deliver. - Sleken to Mestys

Tortoises that you can skin and use their shells for alchemy cauldrons. - Oscuro on premium hunting

How about slap the novice? - Mourdeyan

Everything is hinging on monks at this point. - Tiqal

This is my daughter who's asking - You don't ask me this at home! - Flannihan about Beatrise

Keep in mind that Teras is not Disneyland. - Flannihan

We all love alchemy. - Siwas

I didn't say Stance of the Mongoose yet? - Oscuro

Inner meanness and burst of quicky and… - Mourdeyan mocking the Monk abilities

We'll reduce that. - Gm on the length of time spent on minecart rides
Thank you. - Avidleigh
It'll be six minutes, fifty-nine seconds. - Oscuro

GemStone what squad? - Vyrshkana
GemStone Barbie Squad. - Korelys

Were you drunk or were you sober? - Kaikala
No, I didn't have time to start. - Eulogia

I like being smashed. - Nebhrail
Physically or alcoholically? - Vyrshkana

You're Dhe'nar. You're supposed to be about power, not kissy-kissy. - Nilandia

I like the one that says "Make illegal U-turn ahead." - Thuunk

We never did that. - Nilandia
What? - Vyrshkana
Make an illegal U-turn. - Nilandia

That would make a good roadkill story. Hit something with a car and yell out the window "Time to eat!" - Thuunk

There's candy in there, too. - Eulogia
Candy?! - Vyrshkana
Uh-huh. - Eulogia
I bet there's paint in there, too. - Nilandia

I'm invading the Citadel and tower constantly with halflings now. I broke into the pantry. - Nebhrail

This is the dorkiest thing to brag about. - Eulogia

This is who you need to stalk at Ebon Gate. Jeem. - Eulogia
That's why my badge wais "I reject your froo-froo." - Kveta

I think the new Civ comes out after Ebon Gate, so that'll be good. - Eulogia

Heather, will you protect me please? - Nilandia
Why? - Kveta
Prepare to turn… - Nilandia in GPS mode
AAAAGH! - Orainssa attacks Nilandia

I was just kidding when I said it was Mario that smelled so good, but apparently it was. - Flannihan

You know, everyone gets laid at conventions except me, so that's why he came. - Korelys about Dinner Ticket (her husband)

I was a nerd long before you met me, you just didn't know it. - Korelys

The one thing that Prime has that Plat does not is the Great Gnoll. - Thuunk

My main character is naked, invisible and hangs out by the bank. - Eulogia

You won't have five asses at the same time. - Vyrshkana

I'm glad you came back, your husband's been hitting on me all night. - Essentius

I'm so freaking lit, God I'm glad I'm not driving anywhere. Whee! - Redarch

When she has time, I can use and abuse her to get things out. - Xynwen

Mark Summers. He must be sleeping in formaldehyde. - Nilandia

They've had, like, Steve Martin on it. - Oscuro
Well, he's looked like he was 50 since he was 22! - Jolebin

David, would you like big meat? - Nilandia
Let me work on this little… - Jolebin

And the word of the day is… - Vyrshkana
Masturbation. *cheers* - Jolebin

You tell that to the guys who watch it eight hours a day, six days a week. Eventually, it will fall off. - Nilandia about porn

Watch what you say around her, you will get quoted.

You start out as a human commoner. - Jolebin
No, you start out as a human with no class. - Nilandia
Which shouldn't be hard for these people. - Jolebin

A cleric stole my innocence. - Jolebin

I was nibbling on meat. - Nilandia

Adam, you'll never be a GM to us, you'll always be BelniAdam. - Gretchen
It's okay, I'll just kill you. - Tamuz

I'm fighting a potted plant. - Ercos
Those are easy to kill, just don't water them.- Lewthor

I'm cursing you. - Vyrshkana
Hey, watch that language. - Lewthor

Gotta separate the treasure from the doors. - Nilandia
Man, they do really shoddy construction in this dungeon. - Vyrshkana

Where's the rest of this blanket?! - Vyrshkana
I eated it. - Nilandia

Forest gnomes don't eat. - Orainissa
What, I just live off the sugar in the air? - Vyrshkana
Yeah. - Orainissa
We just water you and turn you towards the sun. - Nilandia
You know, I heard forest gnomes eat their young. - Dhask

Apparently there was a GM magnet in there. - Nilandia about the AoH room

Is can sending magicky bits? - Vyrshkana
Yeah, we're sending each other magicky bits right now. - Nilandia
You know, usually you wait until the rest of us are not in the room to do that. - Nilandia
Woah. - Dhask

You are dead to me. I no longer know who you are. I am putting you on ignore. - Orainissa
I-R-L. - Dhask

Oh, fuck. - Vyrshkana
What? - Orainissa
I just got the theme song to the Smurfs stuck in my head. - Vyrshkana
I don't know how you did that, but if you start singing it, I will have to hurt you. - Orainissa
Tra-la-la-la-la-la… - Nilandia
I'm going to kill you. - Orainissa

Can I get my shoes? - Vyrshkana
Oh, yeah, sure. - Arlia
No, we're going to sell them to midgets. - Orainissa

You know, we should put all the players at a table and make them plan an event for us. - Flannihan

Just a topic, just a word to throw out here: lynching. - Valaraukar

I had that happen to me. I had my cousin's uncle's son do the - Beatrise
Your brother? - Vyrshkana
Oh my god, you followed that. - Beatrise

We now have a holy table. - Beatrise
That looks like a holy goat. It looks like an angelic goat. - Galene
Father, Son and the Holy Goat. - Korelys

You took her to Cuba? It's not nice to take people to the communist neighbors. - Korelys

Sleep? I don't understand this sleeping thing. - Beatrise
Don't make me push you. You made me find pants at like 3 am. I hate you. - Voraviel

If we don't know where it's going to go, how do we know what kind of plants to put in it? - Vyrshkana
Oh, a pertinent question. I like that. - Galene

We're finding random drugs in a bag. - Korelys
Let's take it, see what happens. - Sirina

Also, we are the SS Boner. - Galene
The SS Boner will never sail in Plat. - Voraviel
I'm crushed. - Nilandia

Is it boring because people aren't dying enough? Because we can fix that. - Dhask

Can I make a completely selfish request? - Nilandia
Like the rest aren't? - Vyrshkana

Where are they? - Galene
In my locker. - Deleu about the leftover auction items from EG '09

How about a Sproink stamp? - Nilandia suggesting an auction item
That's a terrible idea. - Voraviel

That's a Prime thing, towns. - Eulogia

It gives you a headache. - Vyrshkana
A good positive attitude never hurts! - Nilandia

If it falls off I will have another one. - Bubba about Oreos in the Minute to Win It games
A clean one. - Someone in crowd

You have won a thousand plats. - Bubba
I have no shame, but… - Participant

WTB: Thrown review. - Nilandia

This one is called Nutstacker. - Bubba

It should be easier on the first day of the con, before all the alcohol. - Elonka

10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4. - Crowd
ME! - DeMyse

Was that third strike or third stroke? - Bubba

You got enough points for style so we're going to give it to you. - Bubba

So that's what he's doing in his office. - Elonka about Bubba bouncing pencils into a glass

God damnit! - Ishnya
That was the correct response. - Someone in crowd

Seven one twelve. - Bubba
Crowd laughs
Seven one two. - Bubba

Faster! - Nilandia
Do you think I want to be up here? Like I said, I have shame! - Ishnya

They're all filled with vodka and you have to drink each one. - Someone in crowd

You can tell Bubba's done this before. - Mourdeyan

Not by the balls on my chinny chin chin. - Mourdeyan

Yes, you can take it off - No, you have to wear it for the rest of the night. - Bubba about the panty hose elephant trunk

I hope you wear odor eaters. - Nilandia about the shoe flipping game

We tested it before. - Bubba
With that piece of spaghetti? - Vyrshkana

Are you taking anything off? - Arlia
Yeah, I'm taking it all off. - Mourdeyan

This one's called Suck It Up. - Bubba
Bubba, you're getting desperate. - somsone in crowd

Should we encourage him? You suck. - Mourdeyan

How many silvers do you need for a bodysuit? - Bubba
Bodysuit or a straight jacket? - Eldreth

Give me three sheep and I'll give you anything you need. - Clunk to Nahida

Lazy chocolate unicorn. - Mourdeyan about the minute to win it game where ding dongs are stacked on the forehead.

First Ding Dongs, then Vaseline. What is this, Shattered? - Nilandia

He's a little obsessed with blowing shit. And sucking. - Mourdeyan
Are you trying to tell us something? - Eldreth

He looks like he's in labor. - Vyrshkana

I can't decide if these people aren't here or they don't want to come up. - Bubba

714? - Bubba
Bingo! - Valaraukar

An owl wouldn't have dropped it. - Someone to Raelee

Worst magic trick ever. - Nilandia

I'm not blowing anything. - Mourdeyan

She said bring it on. - Bubba

You get a sex change! - Bubba to Sebastienne

He doesn't need a boat. - Bubba about Magrid

That was your prize! - Someone in crowd to Jolebin after he hugged Bubba rather enthusiastically

I think I'm going to take my ears off. - Arlia

You just missed it. I won a wedding package! - Sipf

747 - Bubba
There's no jets here, sorry. - Vyrshkana

711. - Bubba
Shit. - Aydan

Does this mean I have to reroll again? - Gryck

290683. - Bubba
YES! - Nirvana
I think she had the ticket. I can't hear anything, but… - DeMyse, who was sitting next to her

How about a free Simucon ticket for next year? She doesn't play. - Bubba

Things don't get a whole lot weirder around here. - Orainissa

Give him Jhyme back! - Crowd
That is actually really tempting. - Bubba

Are you comfortable with bringing us into your bedroom like that? - Jolebin

I'm definitely going to call you a hooker from now on. - Mandy to Tiqal

How are you? - Holgier to Flura
Drunk. - Vyrshkana

Shut the fuck up, I'm so in love with you. - Phii

I have you on ignore IRL. - Nilandia about Orainissa

I am going to play a festival. - Tiqal, playing Dominion
So do I have to go through and log all the merchants? - Vyrshkana, watching

Arlia's not picking up the phone. - Vyrshkana
Maybe she's dead. - Orainissa

If Mario's the only one in the room and there's no women around, is it still his fault? - Orainissa

I'm missing a pair of socks. - Nilandia
I didn't take em. - Vyrshkana
I didn't say you did. (Sock thief.) - Nilandia (muttering)
Damn bitch. - Orainissa

You have a spare wipe. - Nilandia
You have a spare wife?! - Vyrshkana
Wipe. - Nilandia
At least he lives in Indiana and not Utah. - Arlia

You were outvoted. - Vyrshkana
I was voted off the island? - Dhask

I told Bill, but I don't think he's wearing real clothes. - Vyrshkana about Eldreth

Thank you so much for the jerky. It was good. - Nilandia
Yeah, it was like, "Get me away from this food!" - Vyrshkana

We're going over to Panera if you wanted to join us, or sit with us, or eat, or… - Arlia
Whatever. - vyrshkana
Or whatever, as Jenn just said. - Arlia

I heard USS Underwear and was going, "Oh, no, you didn't." - Elonka

The source material was good. - Elonka
But they left out a lot of the source material. - mfberg

I forgot what we came here to see. - Elonka

I think we're actually at the movie we came here to see now. - Vyrshkana after about 20 previews

Is that what you do with all the GMs who don't do their jobs properly? - Eldreth about the prisoner pickup station across from Simutronics HQ

Why does it not surprise me that Bubba has a Dwight Schrute bobble head on his desk? - Eldreth

I looked through the buttons on the soda machine and found caffeine free Coke. Like anyone at a gaming company is going to drink caffeine free. - Eldreth

Is it one, two, click or one, two, three, click? - Elonka

Don't worry about the fine print. - Elonka
We only signed away our soul! - Vyrshkana

We think death isn't painful enough. - Elonka

Here for some shots?
Sure, set em up on the bar. - Mourdeyan

That's the true sign of a geek - using 3-D glasses as sunglasses. - Eldreth

Do you mind if I sit over there? - Elonka to Obseden
She doesn't bite! - Arlia

Drunken gnomette umbrella. - Mourdeyan about Vyrshkana wearing a paper umbrella

I'm so juvenile at times. - Arlia
Only at times? - Vyrshkana

I like the hair. How long have you been growing it? - server at Kobe's
About twenty minutes. - Tyrun/Gothus Goose

It's all right guys, you don't use eyebrows. They don't do anything. - Server

You're trapped! - Elonka
I could leave… - Server

I didn't need my eyebrows. - Vyrshkana
Well, think about it, it's a free eyebrow wax. - Server

They're all drummers who are out of work. - Elonka
But some of us are better than others. - Server
You play lots of Rock Band, don't you? - Somone from DR
They call it Chef Band around here. - Marion

It's a good thing I have no shame. - Tyrun/Gothus Goose
No, you have plenty of shame, it just doesn't bother you. - Marion

You do realize that a hangover is the body's way of telling you you shouldn't have stopped drinking. - Eldreth

It's really hot in here. - Tyrun
So take off all your clothes. - Marion

In some ways I can understand why you want to let it go. In other ways I don't know why you're not on top of a clock tower with a high powered rifle. You're a better person than I am. - Mourdeyan about Eldreth

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